Mum got her thyroid (sp?) out. She was in the hospital Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and part of Sunday. She's home now and she's doing better. A LOT better. As for me I'm all better. I'm done my meds too. I've lost 7 pounds. I feel quite good about that actually. xD My grandmother, aunt, and uncle is here right now. My other aunt and uncle was here last night. Along with their two children Meaghan and Jesse. I guess my father has promised us that he will take us to Newfoundland in the summer. I don't wanna go. He drives me insane. He doesn't let us move. I'm happier with him gone to tell you the truth. It drives me nuts that my aunt constantly tells my sister that she's losing weight and looks awesome but doesn't say a single word about how much I've changed. My sister doesn't even look any different. My face is thinner and my colar (sp?) bones are starting to show. Frig. Seems like no one cares about me. No one notices me. They don't even realize that half the time I'm depressed. They think I'm doing it for attention or something so they just ignore me. It would feel good to get a little bit of praise once in a while. Anyways, I'll stop ranting. It's March break and I have absolutely nothing to do. They wouldn't let me go to New Brunswick for a couple nights. ARG! They make me so mad. Sorry, ranting again. I think I'll go now, just because I'm bored no matter what I do and ranting is making me more upset...
Shantal---x
Still sick. Not much better. No babysitting tomorrow = no money. Crap. Throat is killing me. Don't dare to cough. Nose is stuffy and I have no clue why. I JUST WANT TO GET BETTER!!!!
'kay. Bye.
Shantal---x
UPDATE: On top of this laryngitis I now have a cold!
*sobs*
Uhhg. I'm sick. Too sick. Laryngitis. Bad too. I was at the hospital until 3:20am this morning. They gave me a mask with to open my air ways cause they were so swelled up that I wasn't getting enough air. They gave me a pill and a puffer too. I haven't took the puffer yet. I guess I only need it when my breather gets too short. I'm waiting for mum to get back from the drug store with my drugs. My throat is killing me. I didn't go to school today. The doctor told me not to. So, I'm sitting here bored, tired, and in pain. Ohh, I had 2 advil last night too. I had a REALLY high fever. I think that's why I suddenly weigh 5 pounds lighter than I did yesterday morning [Sweat, unfortunately.. or maybe not.. I don't know?] I've got 3 kids in my garage playing with my little brother. I hate one of them with a passion. He's so annoying. Anyways, I'm living on cranberry juice, water, and milk.. with a meal every now and then so I can keep myself from barfing [I throw up if I don't have something to eat for a long time. I know, it's strange]. Mum painted the living room yesterday... It looks different. She's not finished yet though. It looks good I guess, but, then again, anything would look better than that ugly bird feeder/clock border she had up there. I think that was the cause of my sickness. Seriously. We took it off Wednesday night and yesterday morning I woke up with a horrible sore throat. I've got a major project due tomorrow and a major book report and I don't even have the stuff to do it because I haven't been to school for 2 days. ARRRG. Not that I'm really missing it, but, I don't want to fail either. Ahh well. They better give me extra time, I mean, I didn't get sick on purpose. I'm listening to Jeffree Star... He's BEAUTIFUL! XD How does he do his makeup so perfect? ANYWAYS, I'll stop talking about him.. or her.. whatever he/she prefers to be called now. ARG! Mum's been gone for atleast 30 minutes and she still hasn't brought me my medication yet! Ohh well. I miss my muffin [Courtney]!!!! I haven't talked to her since Wednesday. It really sucks. We're practically joined at the hip while we're at school. Yep, well, I'm going to and further my education by reading and ranting on GaiaOnline. kThnks.
Shantal---x
Well, I'm bored and I'm getting yelled at. Great old grandma dear. She told me I couldn't go on the computer after supper but I don't care. I've got a PDR project due on Friday and it's a totally discusting subject. Eww. I don't even wat to talk about it. As for my love life I'm just WAYYY too confused to deal with it. I'm jsut going to ignore it until I figure myself out some more. I went to Barrington today with Ashley. She had to get her cheque and cash it. We went to the dollar store too. I got reading glasses. I needed them. Nothing better than good old dollar store reading glasses. Awww dear. I'm dying my hair a dark red colour and I'm letting it grow longer. It's about a inch from my shoulders, which is quite long compared to what it was before. I feel like taking a bunch of pictures of myself but I'm too ugly. BLAH. I hate the mirror. I started a new diet today. I guess it's suposed to work. I hope it does. I don't want to be fat anymore. Ick. I don't know what I'm going to do tonight. I think I might read or something. There's nothing better to do. I'm hoping to get to New Brunswick on March break. I really need to. I'm not going to tell you who though because it's personal [No, it doesn't envolve guys who I like or am in love with]. I'm going to go update my site.
Shantal---x
Well.. life has been boring and busy. How that works I've no clue. BUT, one good thing has happend! I AM A PROUD OWNER OF THE NEW FALL OUT BOY CD! "Infinity on High". I have to say it is Fall Out Boy's best work so far. Pete Wentz is an extremely good song writer (A.K.A. he describes exactly how I feel about Crystal, Kaleigh, and Janena perfectly... Ohh, and other feelings I have towards people and their actions. =]).
ANYWAYS... Alicia likes James.. ick. Ohh well. Whatever floats her boat. I really don't know who I'm into right now... But I will tell you this: I have had a thing for the guy who sits in front of me on the bus since I started school at BMHS. The only problem is he's extremely struck on himself. =] I know he wouldn't give me a chance so that's why I've been trying to tell myself to go out with other people. (I know, I'm still sounding like a whore... I'm just confused, that's all. Okay?) I'm not going to tell anyone.. EVER (except for the people reading this). I'll spare myself the embarassment.
I have less than a week until we go and meet with the music teacher. I'm really excited. I hope we actually get somewhere with this. Courtney says that Terilyn plays keyboard but we're not going to let her be the keyboardist because she drives us all crazy and she can't even carry a tune in a bucket. It's pathetic.
Today this woman came to our school and talked about bullying. I was just about to cry while she was showing a slide show of pictures taken at school shootings when Logan shouted, "It looks like two zombies going at it!" (... Surprisingly that IS what the picture looked like.) It ruined the sad moment. xD
Mrs. Benoit and I had a wonderful descussion about P.E. teachers. We both hate them and the subject they teach. She agreed with me that P.E. is just another way of making the people who suck at sports embarassed. I love her sometimes. She has good opinions. Baha.
Well, I'm done talking about my crappy, boring life. Have a wonderful night. =]
---Shantal. x.
The meany dumped me. Shizz. I didn't go to school yesterday.. I was too depressed.. I'm feeling better but I don't know what to do with myself. I feel shitty. Okay..
Bye..
Shantal.
[I'm still not going to use paragraphs because I hate them. kThanks.]
Ohh my god. I haven't been on here in ages. I've been wayyy to busy for it to be healthy.. It's messed. Well, maybe not, but still. 'Kay, so... Christmas was good I guess. I got a guitar. I can play it a little. AND I got clothes and stuff. One of my guy friends came out to me. It's not like I was shocked or anything. I suspected he was gay.. I could just tell. People who read this probably think I'm a whore.. Baha. I'm not though, I just didn't know who I wanted. Well, I guess I'm with a guy now. His name is Steven and he's the sweetest guy ever. I went to his house on Sunday and we went skating.. I fell down twice.. xD. Then we went to his house and sat on his bed. Then I had to go home so his dad took us in his big truck. I had never been in a truck that big before. Bahaha. Funny.. pretty pathetic though. ANYWAYS, I'm not going to tell you the details because.. I'm just not, okay? xD. I couldn't actually believe that my mum was letting me go to his house, but she did and that's all that matters. Ahaha. Yeah.. So.. I've been doing a lot of school work and stuff. It's really boring.. I mean super boring and I hate it. STUPID SCHOOL. I hate school. kThanks. I think I'm going bowling on Friday night with Ashley, Steven, and Cody. I really want to go. I'm waiting for Steven to call me. I should be studying but I'm not. I can't focus. Ahh well. Ima go now cause I don't really know what else to write about. Yep.
'Kay, so, bye.
---Shantal. 
Oh dear. I'm so confused. I think I might like my best friend. I don't want to. I've been reading this book, it's call "Rainbow Boys". It's really good but it's been getting me thinking. Now I'm wondering if I like my best freind. We're both bisexual ( I told her and then she told be she was too). I just don't know what to do. Plus, what if she freaks out if I say something? I really don't want to mess up our friendship. I trust her with everything. Ohh dear. Well, I need to think some more. I'll write more about it when I don't feel so confused. When my mom found out what the book I was reading was about she freaked out. Why do people have to be so homophobic? I mean, after all these years people still don't understand. I can't help it. If it was a matter of choice I would choose to be straight, but it's not like that. I thought it was really sweet, the way the author worded it made it seem so awesome. I wish I had someone to feel that way toward but I don't. I always end up messing it up or something. Anyways, I need to go.
Shantal---xxx.
</3.
Oh my goodness!!! So much has gone on these past couple of weeks. Oh dear! Well, Caleigh and I have started to get teh band together. We're going to ask Keagan if he wants to be lead singer or atleast lead guitarist. I guess he's pretty decent at it. He's been being really nice to me lately. It makes me feel better. *blushes*. AHHH! I'm talking to Jerran at this very moment and he just told me that he asked out Jen and she said yes! Oh my gawsh! I'm right happy for him! I think it will be good for him. ANYWAYS, Keagan played table tennis with me in gym class against Jared. It was fun. He looked right differnt today because he lost his glasses and couldn't find then this morning when he woke up. He looked cute. =P. Well, I'm kind of stuck between two people and I can't really choose. There's Micheal and theres Keagan. I'm not gonig to get my hopes up over Keagan because he's odd that way and you never know what he's gonig to say. I know for sure that Michael likes me. Oh yeah. I do. He sends me sweet little messages on MySpace and stuff. It's kind of cool. It makes me feel special. Dad's home now. GREATTTT. *rolls eyes*. He always finds a way to piss me off. He's being a jerk. He does this and then wonders why I can't wait until I finish school. Grrness. Yeeeep. So.. I was on the phone with Caleigh and all of a sudden I see this flash of light, so I start freaking out and tell her I need to go because it's lightning outside. Then she's like, "Shantal, it's fireworks!". I had totally forgot that that's where my brother and sister ahd gone. It was kinda funny. So I just stood at the kitchen window and watched it. My brother didn't believe that I could see it from the window. He's been being a big jerk lately. Oh well. I'm still not talking to Crystal and Janena. I think I have better ways to waste my time. Crystal is like always sitting behind me making faces or saying something slightly louder just to piss me off, but it doesn't work. I just ignore her. I've been thinking a lot lately and I've realized (with a little bit of Caleigh's help) that the reason why I don't get along with them anymore is because I've matured a little bit. Yes, I still do act like a fool, but besides that I've realized that it doesn't matter weither your rich or poor, or good looking or not, or whatever stupid reason you can come up with for ignoring people, but what really matters is trust and friendliness. After losing them as friends I started to talk to other people in my class and I realized that they could be better friends than Crystal or Janena ever could. I feel like I can even trust them now. People that always used to give me dirty looks are talking to me and everything. Some are even telling me their secrets. I guess they all though I was a bitch because of who I was friends with. Ahh well, I feel better about myself now. I finally feel half decent. I've been playing Pokemon for the past two days constantly. It's fun. XD. I can't help it. Haha. Well, I don't really have much to say now. I just really needed to get all that stuff off my mind and onto some "paper". Haha. [I don't like paragraphs as you can see. =D Thank you!]
<3:Shantal.
xxxx.
| Do you have any tips for bands just getting started? |  |
answered by on 2006-09-06 01:52:00
dont let people around you get you down. be yourself.
